Romance scams
Learn what a romance scam is, and how scammers build a relationship and then abuse a person’s trust to steal money or trick them into doing something illegal.
What is a romance scam
Romance scams take advantage of the way people use the internet to find romance and partners, especially overseas.
There’s nothing wrong with meeting someone online or having a romantic relationship with someone you haven’t met, but scammers do use this to target and trick people.
How a romance scam works
- Scammer contacts you via social media or dating site that you already use.
- They can be very patient and wait weeks or months before starting the scam.
- Eventually they will profess love and say they have some kind of crisis.
- They ask for money, or for you to receive money on their behalf.
- The amount is small at first, but if you pay, the scammer asks for more and more.
- The scam ends when you run out of money or accuse them of being a scammer.
- Rarely, a scammer will ask you to travel to meet them. There are dangers associated with this and you should avoid it.
How to protect yourself against romance scams
These scams work by manipulating your feelings and relying on your natural and normal trust in a person who you think of as a friend or something more. Always remember:
- It’s easy for scammers to lie online, and a person whom you’ve never met face-to-face can make themselves appear to be anything they choose
- Watch out for sudden declarations of love, especially if they claim to have experienced similar tragedies in life
- Scammers prefer to use encrypted messaging apps, such as WhatsApp, Telegram and Discord
- Refusing to meet you in real life or even speak to you via a video connection is often a sign of a scammer.
Romance scammers sometimes elicit intimate images and videos from their victims. They then use those images or videos to blackmail you, by threatening to send them to your family and friends. This is a form of image-based abuse.
What to do if you are scammed
If you think you’ve become involved in a romance scam, it’s important not to be embarrassed but act quickly to protect your finances and identity:
- Contact your financial institutions to change your passwords and cancel/reissue credit and ATM cards
- Change your important passwords such as your main email address and the password/passcode you use to sign into your computer
- Report the scammer to the social media platform they contacted you on. The official webpages of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc have information about this.
- Report scams to the ACCC’s Scamwatch service at www.scamwatch.gov.au/report-a-scam. This web page includes a form you can fill out and also provides links and information on how to get help.
When you suspect your online relationship is a scam, cease contact with the scammer immediately. Don’t accuse them, as they may try to quickly steal money from you before you have time to secure your finances.